Pain

I just got home from a harrowing evening with Mike. Frank went down around 5 and I followed at 6. When I got there Frank was trying to find the nurse to give Mike pain medicine. There was no one at the desk. There was a bell to ring. But no one came. In the mean time I was talking to Mary's friend Bert. I had requested a Christian to come and visit Mike. But Mike was in no condition to see him. I could see Frank trying to get the nurse. So I left Burt to help him.
When I went in Mike's room I could see that he was in a lot of pain. After a while the nurse came in and gave him liquid morphine. After 45 minutes the pain was worse, so I asked for more. She had a new order for Dilaudid (also a narcotic) so she gave him that. Mike was moving all around his bed, standing up, sitting down. leaning over a chair trying to get away from the pain.But nothing helped. After another hour of this I went back to the nurse. She said she would call the hospice nurse after she passed out her meds. Well that wasnt ok with me. So I called the hospice nurse. They had given me the number and told me to call any time. The hospice nurse got a hold of the doctor and he doubled the dose of dilaudid. When I went back in the room the nurse had handed him the pill cup. But he wasnt coordinated enough to put it in his mouth. Instead he dropped it on the floor. When she brought a replacement, I took it in my fingers and put it in his mouth. Fortunately he drinks water well. But he was still climbing the walls in pain. I just sat there helplessly while tears rolled down my face. After an hour the hospice nurse called back and asked how he was. I told her he was still in pain. She told me she would send out a hospice nurse. When I went back in the room at 9:15 he was sound asleep. So I pulled the blanket over him and turned out the light.I called hospice and told them they could cancel the hospice nurse. I told the nurse to be sure and have the night nurse check on him  and if he was awake to offer him pain meds.
Sue has offered to come down and help me. At first I thought I would be ok. But now I know I need her to stay with Mike part of the night to be sure he gets his pain meds. His mind is going. So he needs to be watched. There arent enough nurses to do that.
We are entering into a new phase of this ordeal.
Pray for me please.