Conversation with Mike

I was feeling sad today, thinking about Michael. I went to the Wild Animal Park. It is a place where we can talk. As I sat  by our pond, I called his spirit in to chat. He comes to me at that place in a magical way. I used my iPhone to dictate the conversation.

Mike's spirit at the Wild Animal Park.

Here is the conversation we had as we walked around the park:
Conversation with Mike  as I struggled with the why

Mke: 

It is what it is. 

You can't change the past so stop trying

You can only change your self. 

I'm going to help you. 

Me: 

Mike, I want peace

You have peace 

You can help me find it. 

Mike:

Trust the  process

There isn't a point when you get there. 

It's a process

In fact you never get there

It's the expectation of getting past the pain that hurts.

Learn to live with it

 In the end it will all make sense

Me: I don't want the pain to stop completely. Because I don't want you to go. Even if it hurts

Mike:

I have been coming back to enjoy the family. 

Did you see Oliver smiling at me? That was me he was looking at over your shoulder. 

Mom, I have slipped the bonds of earth like a snake from its skin. All that was not me is no longer holding me back.

Instead of fighting against the pain allow it to flow through. It is a sweet sorrow, isnt it Mom?

Me: 

Yes it is Mike. Because it makes me feel closer to you.

New to this blog?

If you would like to look back to earlier entries look at the right of the page to select where you want to go. On the bottom right you will find links back to earlier entries. The entries describing Mike's death start in May of 2011.
You might also be interested in my newer blog, Traveling to Myself in which I tell more of my story. After Mike died I developed Lymphoma a kind of cancer. This blog describes my journey through the world of cancer and out the other side.