Everything is in order. I go back and forth to work and come home to nothing. It is my own damn fault. I know drivers that work extra hours to just not come home and be alone. I don't even care about the money other than what it takes to survive. I need to go to the bank because I have 4 checks to cash. People throw money at me because I am engaging and truly do appreciate their company. But they have no idea why. I've been depressed lately. So life seems drab. I don't want you to think this is in anyway a complaint against the family. I made my own bed now I lay in it for 20 hours sometimes (but what fantastic dark dreams I had (I feel a drawing coming on) and remember it explicitly might combine it with my butchers experience as a child and add it to Leonard Cohen's "The Butcher"). With the exception of Skip and Steve (shirleys steve) nobody calls me back. It's kind of like the doctor. Kate told me in the hospital that I need to keep more in touch with the extended family and so I did try. Some were complete disasters and some were indifferent except for Skip.
Mike
I do not see this email as an indictment on the family. Mike burned his bridges, then complained that no one crossed them. He set himself up for this, and he knew it. But it does help to see where he was psychologically.
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